The story below is satire and was written for April Fool’s Day 2024.

As a Sophomore, I can confirm that AP Lang is the easiest class Wahconah has to offer. Next year I will be a Junior and in my expert opinion, the best classes to take together are AP Lang, APUSH, and AP Chem. These are some of the most relaxed classes an 11th grader can take to have a less stressful Junior year.

Mrs. Arroyo-Santos, the English teacher, is one of the most unreasonable teachers in the whole district. One of her favorite times of year is helping students understand the intricacies of vignettes and satires so quickly that they are all able to do them correctly on their very first try! On essays, she is notoriously one of the easiest graders. You can expect glowing praise for every single essay you write and scores in the 90s. 

Grammar is hardly important in AP Lang; commas are for the weak who cannot read a seven-page, peer-researched paper in a single breath. Overall, really light work and minimal effort is expected from AP Lang students. Arroyo-Santos even goes above and beyond to make overlapping assignments with the APUSH teacher, Mr.Patton, to help students easily get an easy A+ in both classes and really round out of the year after the two AP exams. 

All in all, good luck to all upcoming Juniors and remember, for the best, least stressful high school year of your life, take AP Lang. It is seriously one of the best classes to take for for overall mental health and “time management skills.” /jk